A notification pinged on his phone: "Your order has arrived. Thank you for using FREE SHIP ONLINE."

Elias looked at the deck. There were no sailors, just a single, weathered envelope pinned to the mast by a rusty dagger. He climbed over his balcony railing and onto the rigging. As his feet hit the salt-slicked wood, the streetlights behind him flickered out.

He ran to the balcony. Below, the asphalt of the street had turned into churning, dark water. Rising from the depths was the Aurelia , its tattered sails white as bone under the streetlights. The wooden hull scraped against the brick of his apartment building with a deafening groan.

A low, guttural horn blasted through his laptop speakers—a sound so deep it rattled the coffee mug on his desk. Outside his apartment window, the modern city sounds of sirens and engines suddenly went silent. A thick, briny fog rolled in off the street, smelling of salt and ancient rot.

He opened the envelope. Inside was a packing slip with his name at the top. Under "Cost," it didn't list a dollar amount. It simply said: The Captain.

He had finally found the ultimate deal, but as the city lights faded into the mist, Elias realized the one thing every bargain hunter eventually learns: Go to product viewer dialog for this item. Funnels & Feelings | A Love Story in Digital Marketing