[s8e2] A La Cart May 2026

"Dad, I don't think the engine should be held on by used chewing gum," Chris had worried, staring at the rattling hunk of metal they’d salvaged from a discarded woodchipper.

"That’s just weight reduction, Chris! We’re getting faster!"

The drama had started, as most things in the Griffin household did, with a sudden, unearned surge of confidence. Peter and Chris had decided to bond by building a go-kart for the local derby. However, their "engineering" process mostly involved Peter drinking beer while Chris tried to figure out if the wheels were supposed to be round or "more of a hexagon shape for grip." [S8E2] A La Cart

The green flag dropped, and the karts tore away. Peter and Chris were immediately overtaken by a toddler in a Barbie Jeep, but Peter wasn't deterred. He leaned forward, screaming at the engine to "dig deep." As they rounded the first turn, the Griffin Ground-Pounder began to vibrate so violently that Chris’s hat flew off, followed shortly by one of the side mirrors. "We’re losing parts, Dad!"

"The only thing I’m eating today is victory, Joe! And maybe a churro if the guy comes back around," Peter shot back. "Dad, I don't think the engine should be

"See, Chris? That’s what happens when you use quality adhesives."

By race day, the "Griffin Ground-Pounder" was a terrifying sight. It had no seatbelts, a steering wheel stolen from a bumper car, and an exhaust pipe that emitted a sound like a dying walrus. Their primary rival was none other than the oversized, hyper-competitive Joe Swanson, who had built a high-tech kart for Kevin that looked like it had been designed by NASA. Peter and Chris had decided to bond by

They didn't get a trophy—mostly because they had technically caused three separate pile-ups and the judges weren't sure if their vehicle qualified as a "car"—but as they walked home carrying the engine in a wagon, Peter knew he’d taught his son an important lesson: if you're going to fail, do it at high speeds with a lot of noise.